Monday, April 6, 2009

~Broken & Filled~

Ok, so I think my last post left off with me being in a state of panic and waiting on 2 doctor appointments. So....

~I had "my appointment" last Wed. (4/1/09). All they did was drew some blood to be sent off for genetic disorder testing. I'll find out my results next week when I go in for my "boy or girl" ultrasound!!!! Please be praying for good results and an ultrasound that shows a healthy baby!
~Abby's doctor appointment was the next day (4/2/09). I took her to a new doctor in McComb, because we are VERY unhappy with the Brookhaven Children's Clinic (enough said). So, anyways...I LOVED this doctor!!! He answered all 25 questions I had (haha), checked my baby's tummy out, and rested my fears of her having this rare disease that she was diagnosed with a few weeks ago. When I left the doctor's office, I was able to breathe for the first time in weeks! Thanks for all the prayers.



So...Thursday night I had SO much to do before I left for the Beth Moore Conference. I didn't end up getting much done that night because I didn't feel too good (good try, Satan!). But I woke up Friday morning and got on the ball!! From 8 that morning until I left the house at 1, I vaccumed the entire house, did all the dishes, got Abby bathed, got all our laundry washed and put up, and got myself showered and packed! I was feeling goooooooood!! :) I was SOOooooo...excited about what God was going to do in my heart that weekend that I could barely stand it! I knew I needed to be refreshed, but I had no idea just how bad Beth was going to rock my world!


I'm really debating on whether or not to talk about the conference, because I know I will not even do it justice...but my heart is just overflowing right now, so I've gotta share just a little!


First conviction of the weekend- "HOLY=WHOLLY" Yes, that's right....in order to be HOLY, you've got to give yourself WHOLLY to the Lord. It sounds simple, and it may be...but it totally convicted me. I realized that I've just been giving bits and pieces of myself and my life over the Lord....and then trying to handle the rest on my own! It suddenly hit me, like a ton of bricks....HELLO!! Maybe that's why I've been lacking joy, and struggling with finding peace?! It's because I cannot do ANYTHING on my own strength...I've got to give myself wholly to God's will for my life. Satan has been stealing my joy for way too long now...I'm claiming it back!


Second conviction- Prayer. My prayer life has become way too complicated for the personal relationship that it is. When I conversate with my best friends, I don't have to really "think" about what we'll talk about...I don't plan out every word. So, why do I do that with God? I had forgotten that prayer is a constant conversation with God about every little & big thing in my life! From something as little as, "God, thank you for this magnificent hair day I'm having" to big things like, "God, continue to grow this baby as a healthy boy or girl." I miss my view of God as my best friend...not someone who's out to get me, or disappointed in my every downfall!!



I could seriously go onnnnnn and onnnnnnnn about everything that filled my heart this weekend, but basically it comes down to....the Lord broke me....and then he filled me! He truly is an amazing God.



Here is A pic from this weekend....I was so wrapped up in the spirit, that I totally forgot to take pics! lol

*I am so blessed to have these girls in my "close community of faith"*

So, at the start of this new week, I think about all the exciting things coming up in the next week: seeing Joe Castillo tonight at church (look him up on YouTube!), getting my hair done, Abby's Easter pics, my sister's birthday, starting Sunday morning off with a big Easter egg hunt for Abby, rejoicing in the resurrection of our Savior, finding out if this precious baby is a boy or a girl, and then leaving for DISNEY!!!!!! Please, Please continue to pray for me on a daily basis....and continue to pray for a healthy pregnancy! I love yall dearly!!

Broken & Filled,

Tonya

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